Can you guess which of the following are true or false.

Taxes - a clear-cut explanation

Tell me, Green, what makes you so smart?

If the Airlines sold paint....

This is too true to be funny.

Smiths is openeing a new 'Superstore' in Logan.

Paul was in an accident at work, so he filled out an insurance claim. The insurance company contacted him and asked for more information. This was his response.....

(20 April 2008, Atlantic Ocean, Brazil) a Catholic priest recently ascended towards heaven on a host of helium party balloons. Adelir Antonio de Carli, 41, was attempting to set the world record for clustered balloon flight to publicize his plan to build a spiritual rest stop for truckers.

First Important Lesson  - Cleaning Lady.

None of us really knows about the people we decide to hate.

1970: Long Hair
2000: Longing for hair

    If Stars and Stripes offend you, or you don't like Uncle Sam, then you should seriously consider a move to another part of this planet. We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change, and we really don't care how you did things where you came from. This is OUR COUNTRY, our land, and our lifestyle.

One day I decided to quit.

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

A couple of men working along the roadside....

Did you ever stop to think about UP?

John and Joe, are getting very drunk at the bar when suddenly

Dear Mr Baker,

As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel.....

Subject:

8:00 a.m. 

If you live in California or have friends in California, send this article on to them. We can only stop this outrageous new law that would sexually indoctrinate our school children if enough people quickly band together and successfully complete this petition to create a referendum on the bill. Family Leader California is in the thick of this battle and we need an army of volunteers to step forward — not just for the sake of their children, but for unborn generations to come. If we cannot stop this law from taking effect January 1st, we will never have the opportunity again. This is a doable job, but not easy one unless everybody stands up to help.

Those of us who do not live in California have a stake in this as well, because textbook publishers are national and books prepared for California may end up in your school.

I CHILDPROOFED MY HOUSE, BUT THEY STILL GET IN.

Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took my $2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding the  nickel and  3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried. Why do I tell you this?

Are We Free to Choose are we still in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave???

I am doing community service

A Cure Foreverything.... Almost

Remember the five simple rules to be happy

1. Free your heart from hatred.

2. Free your mind from worries

3. Live simply.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less.

The following excerpts are actual answers given on history tests and in  Sunday school quizzes by children between 5th and 6th grade ages in  Ohio. They were collected over a period of three years by two teachers.  Read carefully for grammar, misplaced modifiers, and of course,  spelling!  Kids should rule the world, as it would be a laugh a minute  for us adults and therefore no time to war or argue.

Everybody is remaking their oldies hits!

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline  was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

The most destructive habit.....................Worry

The greatest Joy...............................Giving

The greatest loss..............................Loss of self-respect

I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about......

I'm Okay
By Rabona Gordon

"I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see wha t happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

Please note that Texas is the only state with a legal right to secede from the Union (please refer to the Texas- American Annexation Treaty of 1848).  We Texans love y'all, but...

Answers received on exams given by driving schools.

IF YOU KNOW THE BIBLE EVEN A LITTLE, YOU'LL FIND THIS HILARIOUS!

If Airlines Sold Paint ..... (NOT too far off the mark either!)

The college football season is over, the Super Bowl is here and freezing temperatures surround us like a school of piranhas waiting to attack every bit of exposed flesh.  Some people have strong desires to hibernate until after April showers have brought May flowers.   Others from the roots of their souls feel they need to go to San Diego, Cancun or anywhere in the South Pacific.  I fear we have entered the winter blahs season.....

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden....

 The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation. This was serious, and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II - a mere 54 years ago!